To avoid protests and negative press, Donald Trump decides to go to his next campaign rally in his limo alone with his driver. They take the scenic route through lonely farmlands. Not another soul in sight for miles, Trump enjoys the view and dozes off to sleep.
As luck would have it, his limo runs over a pig that suddenly ran across the road. The limo comes to a screeching halt, waking Trump. Both men get out of the limo to see the now flattened pig. Looking around, they see a farmhouse on the horizon. Assuming the pig's owner lives there, Trump tells his driver to go there and apologize to the owner.
"Go to the farmhouse, tell them you're my driver, and that you killed the pig," Trump tells his driver. The driver nods and goes off to the farmhouse.
Trump tries to call for help on his phone, but the battery dies as he makes the call. Reluctantly, he decides to wait in the limo. Hours pass, and the driver finally returns to the later that night. Trump, furious, demands the driver explain himself.
"Well, boss. At first, when I told them what you told me to say, they couldn't believe their ears. They were shocked at first, but they started celebrating for some reason. The farmer gave me a mighty handshake, a strong pat on the back and offered me his finest home brewed beer. His wife whipped up a wonderful meal and even made a delicious apple pie. After all that, their beautiful daughter took me to her room and, uh, well..."
Trump, now more confused than angry, asked his driver. "What the hell did you tell them?"
"Well, what you told me to tell them, boss: 'I'm Donald Trump's driver. I killed the pig'."
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.