Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris facts / jokes are satirical factoids about American martial artist and actor Chuck Norris that have become an Internet phenomenon and as a result have become widespread in popular culture. The 'facts' are normally absurd hyperbolic claims about Norris' toughness, attitude, virility, sophistication, and masculinity. Enjoy our large collection of Chuck Norris Jokes right here!

Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.

Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so...

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips.

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and p...

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till".

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he alw...

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad ...

Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies.

Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He pot...

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter pl...

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009.

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His...

Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes.

Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disem...

Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered ...

Some people like to eat frogs' legs.

Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norr...

When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens.

When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And...

When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide.

When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes...

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer.

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris&q...