... the first time I worked in Wales I was in the bar of the pub I was sleeping at and getting on quite well with the locals, something many Englishmen will know can be hard to do if you don't know someone there.
One old boy decided, without any prompting, to instruct me on the best ways to make love to a sheep. He said that the two things you could not do without, apart from a good looking sheep, were a dry stone wall and a pair of Wellington boots.
In a Welsh accent that I will not try to replicate he explained that you lift the sheep's rear legs and put them inside your wellies with the sheep facing you, you can put her front legs over your shoulders and, with a good solid wall behind you, you can begin to pleasure your lady ... I mean sheep.
Alternatively you can turn her around, again putting her back legs inside your boots while putting your new lover's front legs over on top of the dry stone wall. From here, he went on, you have your hands free to stroke her back, her head, or reach around and fondle her udders.
He went on that he rarely used that second method any more because you miss out on all the kissing.
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