Here's a joke from Bulgaria, translated for your convenience.

One a motorway near the coast in Varna a musclebound mafioso (refered to as mutra in Bulgaria) is driving with his subordinates in his brand new Mercedes S63 AMG. When he nears a traffic signal, he gets rear ended. Pissed off, he gets out to have a look. Turns out that an elderly gentleman in a rusty Lada smashed into him. He gets him out of the car and starts yelling at him:

-What the f***, man! This is my brand new ride, I ain't even got no insurance on this b****, 'cause I bought it with all my "revenue"! You... you are ohing to literally pay for this! Right here, right now! I don't care how, just get busy or me and my boys are going to stop being nice!

So the shaking old man humbly replies:

-I am terribly sorry sir, I can't pay you back right this moment, but my son might be able to help. He's a dolfin trainer. Do you mind if I call him over?

-Shure, whatever, just do it now!

So he does, and after ten minutes two Hummers park in front and behind them, a dosen strong men jump out from inside and beat the living hell out of the magiosos. Then the old man's son goes over to him and says:

-Der father, how many times do I have to tell you, I'm not a dolfin trainer, I'm a seal instructor!

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