Chuck Norris Facts: 26

Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.

After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said, "Of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.

There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

Chuck Norris' penis is a third degree blackbelt, and an honorable 32nd-degree mason.

Chuck Norris does not follow fashion trends, they follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their ass. Nobody follows Chuck Norris.

The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris's co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.

Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

The Drummer for Def Leppard's only got one arm. Chuck Norris needed a back scratcher.

Chuck Norris was the original sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel.

Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich