A short history of the christinization of the Vikings.

During the 9th century the archbishop of Bremen decided to send missionaries to the pagan Vikings, and set together a mission consisting of three people, Ansgar, Witmar and Henze. But when they arrived at the Viking capital of Birka they made the vikings there very angry by insulting their gods. The missionaries were siezed and were thrown to the mercy of the King.

The King said: "Ansgar, you did not insult our gods, but you are the leader of this abhorrent mission so you are still responsible. But I am a merciful King. You can choose between an honorable death, or dishonor by 10 røfahnutl. Which do you choose?"

Ansgar didn't know what røfahnutl was, but thought that anything was better than death, so he said "I chose røfahnutl". The vikings tore of Ansgars clothes, and 10 of them proceeded to rape him in the ass.

The king then addressed Witmar and said "You insulted our gods, but I am a merciful King. You can choose between an honorable death, or dishonor by 20 røfahnutl. Which do you choose?"

Ansgar whispered to Witmar "We can lie about this when we come back to Bremen, anything is better than death!" Witmar nodded and said "I choose røfahnutl" and 20 vikings then proceeded to rape him in the ass.

Lastly the king adressed Heinze, and said "You insulted our gods the worst, but I am a merciful King. You can choose between an honorable death, or dishonor by 50 røfahnutl. Which do you choose?"

Heinze stood up and said "I choose honor, and I choose death!"

The king responded "Your bravery honours you! I hereby sentence you to death by røfahnutl!"

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