An Apple computer walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "What'll it be, Mac?"
Plant Jokes
Topical Jokes for 10/19
(for best results, read in the voice of your fa...
Why didn't Steven jobs get treated for cancer?
an apple a day keeps the doctor away
Why doesn't Ebola harm fruit?
Because if it affected an Apple it'd be called ...
What's red and has 7 dents?
Snow White's cherry
What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Getting raped.
So these two couples had known each other for decades, and would meet once a month for dinner.
It was always the same routine, they would meet...
How many maple leafs does it take to change a tire?
Only 1, unless it's a blowout then the whole te...
How do we know Snow White was a hipster?
She could never say no to apple.
What is red and has seven little dents in it?
Snow White's cherry.
Why don't boobies make apple juice?
BECAUSE GIRLS ONLY HAVE A "PEAR" AHAHEHUEHUEHUE...
Knock knock
Who is it?
Daisy
Daisy whom?
Daysi me rollin...
You have to admit, Apple is being treated unfairly after the recent news about the iPhone 6+...
They merely wanted to provide a phone with the ...
The iCloud leaks weren't an accident at all.
It was Apple trying to make up for causing Adam...
With all the complaints about iOS 8 taking forever to install...
You'd think that Apple would rename it to iOS ∞.
What do Porsche and Apple have in common?
New product, same design.
Apple Iphone 6
Walked into an Apple store this morning to buy
...
How do elephants hide themselves in the jungle?
They paint their testacles red and climb in a c...
Just saw on the news that Apple is suing Samsung:
They claim that the Galaxy S3 has copied concep...
U2 sent their new album to every Apple device through the Cloud.
I hear if you play the first song backwards you...
A feghoot by Isaac Asimov.
"Feghoot watched with interest as a husband and...
Meanwhile, in mid-2015
A Google Glass wearer and an Apple Watch wearer...
Liars
A preacher finished the service one morning b...