Special Apples

A man walks in to the U.S. Patent Office with a sack of apples.
"I'd like to patent these apples," he says to the patent clerk.


The clerk tells him, "You can't patent apples, silly!"


The man says, "But these are special apples. There are none like
these in the world!"


Curious, the clerk asks him if he can taste one of the apples.
He reaches into his sack, pulls one out and gives it to the
clerk, who promptly takes a bite. "Wow! This tastes just like a
grapefruit!"


The man smiles and says to the clerk, "turn it over."


The clerk takes a bite out of the other side of the apple and
exclaims "Man! That tastes just like an orange! What else do you
have in there?"


The man gives him another one and the clerk bites into it. "How
do you do this? This one tastes just like a pear!" Says the
clerk.


"Turn it over", says the man again.


"Holy Cow, this side tastes like watermelon!"


Then the clerk leans in close to the man and whispers, "Hey
buddy, do you have any apples in there that taste like pussy?"


The man reaches into his sack again, pulls out another apple,
and hands it to the clerk. After taking a bite, the clerk starts
spitting the apple back out as fast as he can.


"Hey jerk," yells the clerk, "This tastes just like shit!"


The man smiles and says... "Turn it over!"