Chum the sheep

There was this young man who had had enough of city life so he moves to the country and decides to run a sheep farm. He educated himself as much as he could on how to run a farm. He bought a farm, and buys a heard of sheep. Everything is going well, the sheep are properly housed and fed. The sheep are all grazing and seem fit all season. But when it came to sheering the sheep something went horribly wrong, the sheep's wool was coming out all tough and stringy. When the young man tried to sell the wool he was told it was worthless. A buyer examined the wool and asked;

"Did you chum the sheep?"

The young man had no idea what the buyer meant. He figured it was just some slang he never heard before for feeding and grazing the sheep. The buyer said the wool was worthless and he had to throw it away. To recover some of his loss the young farmer decided to slaughter some of the sheep. So he took a few sheep to the butcher who said;

"The meat on these sheep is tough to the bone. It's worthless. Did you chum the sheep?"

And young man had no idea what the butcher meant so he asked what chumming the sheep meant.

"To fuck it, of course," said the butcher.

The young man was shocked and said the butcher was kidding. The butcher didn't smile at all and was dead serious.

"You gotta chum the sheep lad," said the butcher, "If you don't chum the sheep, the sheep get upset and the wool comes out all stringy. The meat gets too tough to eat."

The young man said even if he could fuck the sheep he couldn't possibly fuck the whole heard. The butcher said relax, he could hire a professional sheep chummer. Everyone in the county hired sheep chummers. So the young farmer asked how much it cost to hire professional sheep chummer. $20/hour. That seemed steep to the young farmer, but the butcher said.

"They're from Wales, lad, that's the most they can afford to pay ye," said the butcher.

So the young farmer calls a sheep chummer who shows up the next day, an old man from Wales.

"Aye, I'm here to chum the sheep," he said.

So the young farmer points out the heard and the old man has at it. He chummed the whole heard in just over two hours. All of a sudden the sheep's wool was vastly improved, the butcher said the meat was as tender as he ever saw. The young farmer as astonished how effective it was and he asked the butcher when did people discover sheep chumming was so effective? The butcher said it was shortly after people from Wales discovered two brand new uses for sheep.

"What was that?" asked the young farmer.

"Wool and meat," said the butcher.