A Talk With Dad

A father and son are talking after the son has been away for a long time in the Air Force. The son recounts his tale as the father listens intently:

"I was so excited to join the Air Force. I'm sure you remember, Dad," the son says.

"Yup," the father says, remembering.

"But when I got there, there was always one thing that I had trouble with: parachuting. It just freaked me out. And we had to do drills where we practiced over and over."

"Uh huh," the dad says, cajoling his son to go on.

"We wouldn't actually jump out of the plane during the practice session, but we did them to get ready for the real thing. So for months, I'm practicing with my squad mates and I think I'm finally ready for actually parachuting out of the plane. Then, near the end of our training, we had to. We had to actually jump out of a plane to complete our training!"

"Really!" the father says, excitedly.

"Yeah, but I'm getting cold feet, you know? The rest of my group does it, no problem. The drill sergeant is telling them to jump off, and they're all relying on their training. To them it's no big deal. But I just couldn't get over jumping out of a plane thousands of feet above the ground. At long last, it's just me and the sergeant. He asks what's wrong and I say I'm afraid to jump. By this point, with everyone gone and with all the months of training, he's really agitated. So he says to me, 'Look, if you don't jump off of this plane, I'm going to stick my DICK up your ASS!'" The son pauses.

"Well, did you jump?" the father asks.

"Yeah, a little at first," the son responds.