...and are greeted by a charming looking gentleman at the gate. "Greetings," the man says "I'm Satan, welcome to hell!" to which the 3 men begin to back away in fear, but Satan approached them gently "Now now fellas, there's nothing to be scared of! I'm quite the reasonable guy! Come on I'll give you the tour!" Unsure, but curious, the 3 guys follow Satan around through various rooms.
"And here we have Dave! Dave wished to have enough money to swim in!" and they peaked through a hole to see a man gleefully swimming through gold. "Now, you each get your own room!" and the men were ecstatic!
The first man bursts forward "Oh, Oh me first!" and Satan nods "I want all of the most beautiful women!" and Satan smiles and leads him to a platinum door, opening it to reveal a warehouse sized room full of the most beautiful women of all races, and all naked, enticing him to enter.
Satan stops the man from entering "One last thing, a simple 'catch' as you might say, you cannot leave the room for 1000 years. Are you sure this is your one true desire?" he asks, receiving a yes without hesitation. "Very well, the room is all yours!" the man gives Satan a hug and runs into the room with Satan closing, and locking the door behind him.
The second man, a little pudgy man, steps forward and says "I love to eat, I want a room full of the best food from all around the world!" and Satan nods, and brings the man to a different room, which when opened revealed different varieties of cakes, pie, cooked entrees, and delicacies. His eyes light up, and he rushes on in with the door closing and locking behind him.
Satan looks towards the third man who hesitantly asks Satan "Hey man, do you have a room with a lot of weed? I just want to be baked off of my ass for 1000 years" and Satan smiles "I'm Satan! Of course I've got weed!" and he leads the man to another door, which revealed a warehouse full of marijuana. "Hell yeah! Thanks Satan!" and he enters with the door closing and locking behind him.
1000 years later, Satan makes his rounds to check up on the men in the rooms, he stops by the first room to find the first man in a room full of babies, pregnant nagging women, lots of crying, and feces everywhere. The man spots the light, looks at Satan, and reaches out his hand "Satan...Help me!" and Satan laughs and closes the door again.
He opens the second door to find a man so fat he can't even sit up, he's covered in his own feces, the food around him is all rotten, flies are everywhere. He too spots the light, looks toward Satan "Satan...help me!" and Satan laughs and closes the door again.
He walks over to the last door, unlocks it, and suddenly the door flies open, the man grabs Satan and yells "Satan you gotta lighter!?"
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