Woman's Prayer

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who's willy is thick and long
One who thinks before he speaks
When he promises to call, won't wait weeks
I pray that he is gainfully employed
And when I spend his cash he won't be annoyed
Pulls out my chair and opens my door
Massages my back and begs to do more
Oh send me a man who makes love to my mind
Knows just what to say when I ask, "how big's my behind"?
One who'll make love till my body's a twitchin
In the hall, the loo, the garden and kitchen
I pray that this man will love me no end
And never attempts to shag my best friend
And as I kneel and pray by my bed
I look at the shithead you sent me instead!!! Amen