Why so stupid?

Who Says a "Blonde" is Stupid? When she took me to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport left", she turned around and went home. She has one toe, and bought a pair of flip flops. She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. She got stabbed in a shoot-out. She told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk". When the computer said "Press any key to continue", she couldn't find the "Any" key. She thought 2Pac Shakur was a Jewish Holiday. When I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said, "Cherry or Grape?" She sat on the TV and watched the couch. She sent me a fax with a stamp on it. She was on the corner giving out potato chips, yelling, "Free Lays!". She tried to drown her goldfish. She thought a quarterback was a refund. She got locked in a grocery store and nearly starved to death. If you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change. They had to burn down the school to get her out of third grade. She took a spoon to the Super Bowl. Under "Education" on her job application, she puts "Hooked on Phonics." She thinks socialism means partying. She tripped over a cordless phone. She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. At the bottom of application forms where it says "Sign Here", she puts "Sagittarius". She asked for a price check at the dollar store. If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. She stands up on an empty bus. She studied for a blood test and failed. She thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center. She thought Hamburger Helper came with another person. She thought Meow Mix was a record for cats. She thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train. She invented a solar powered flashlight. She sold the car for gas money. When she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home to get 16 friends. When she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. She went to Dr. Dre for a pap smear. She thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your phone bill. She ordered a cheeseburger from McDonald's and said, "Hold the cheese". When she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead. She peels M&Ms to make chocolate chip cookies. She got locked in Furniture World and slept on the floor. When she got to the empty 4-way stop, she waited for the other 3 cars to get there.