A drunk guy walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender wanders over and asks the guy, "what'll you have?"
Drunk guy says, "get me a whiskey and get a drink for that douchebag chick at the end of the bar."
The bartender says, "buddy, you can't talk about our patrons like that!"
"Just get me a whiskey and get a drink for the douchebag at the end of the bar."
Bartender says, "get your drunk ass outta here, buddy."
"Okay, okay, get me a whiskey and get a drink for the *lady* at the end of the bar."
Bartender pours the guy a whiskey and goes down to the end of the bar. "Lady, that guy down there wants to buy you a drink, what'll you have?"
Lady says, "How nice! I'll have a vinegar and water, please!"
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