"Two tone paint work" - Original color and rust.
"One careful owner" - But the other nine were clumsy as anything.
"10,000 trouble-free miles" - Crashed in the last 20 feet.
"Heated rear window" - So you don't get cold hands when push-starting the thing in winter.
"Very clean" - Only washed if and when it rains.
"Lady owner" - The glove box is full of half-used cosmetics.
"Clean interior" - All the rubbish is under the floormats.
"Immobilizer" - The gear shift comes off in your hand.
"Anti-theft device" - I can let you have a Rottweiler cheap.
"Drives beautifully" - ... in a straight line; the steering is all over the place.
"Low mileage" - The odometer is on its third time around.
"Full service history" - Charlie in the garage round the corner checked it over last week.
"Economical" - Doesn't use much fuel, as it can't go any faster than 30 mph.
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.