Alright guys, here we are to recap the day's jokes. Let's get started.
First off in the news, it looks like the TSA arrested a woman for singing Whitney Houston on an airplane - but you should've seen what the TSA did when they caught those ridiculous musical militants of the Elton Jihad.
(Chuckle in back. Burp)
As a refresher, Taco Bell did announce it yesterday was going to make a new waffle taco. However, the Taco Bell CEO advises you eat the waffle taco for breakfast so your family has the rest of the day to set up and host your funeral.
Vice President Biden made a speech to college grads telling them to avoid cynics. Biden advised the graduates, "Say no to nay-sayers. You CAN stick your whole fist in your mouth. Believe me. I've done it."
Big entertainment news. FOX is now planning to bring back "24". Of course, at Kiefer Sutherland's age, the show is now called "23 Plus Sitting Down for 'Murder, She Wrote' at 7".
(Scattered Applause. Man coughs)
Um, In case you missed it, International Clitoris Week has just ended. I think it's appropriate that at the end of the Week, we take a moment of silence to honor all the brave men who sacrificed life and limb going down on Paris Hilton.
Very strange story, Mel Gibson told reporters he is a Tom Jones fan - and to make sure this racist Gibson lunatic stops listening his music, Tom Jones has just released "What's New Zion Lion?".
The FBI recently raided an FBI student for making rice in a pressure cooker. You should have seen how tense it got when the student said he could really make the rice explode with some spicy Sriracha.
That's all for today, folks. Check out the running feed!
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Adios!
ATTENTION: I misspelled "jokes". I also peed the bed till I was ten.
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