Three men at the pearly gates.

Three men arrive roughly at the same time to heavens pearly gates. St. Peter tells the gentleman that to be accepted into heaven, you have to re-tell the story on how you died. If it was noble enough, you will be granted access to the holy kingdom. If not. Hell. So the first man steps up to recount his story. "Well you see, I got off early from work and decided to surprise my wife with wine and flowers. I entered our bedroom only to discover my wife naked, alone and panting. Now of coarse I assumed the worst and tore apart the whole house looking for her lover. After not finding anyone I made my way back to the bedroom to apologize. Seconds after I walked back in, a pair of hands hanging off the balcony catch my eye. Furious, I ran into the study, grabbed a hammer and went to town bagging that bastards fingers until he fell. Thinking a fall from a second floor balcony wasn't enough to kill him, I ran into the kitchen, grabbed the refrigerator and shoved it over the balcony. In all the rage and anger I wound up having a heart attack." Seeing as his story involved murder. He was sent to hell. The second guy steps and to recount his story. "I was fixing a sliding glass door for a customer. Yanking at some stubborn nails, I lost my balence from a third floor balcony I was on and fell ove the rail. Luckily I was able to catch the rail below. I was screaming for someone to help me but instead of helping some asshole smashes my fingers with hammer. I fall. I hit the ground hard but to my surprise, I'm alive. Just as i was getting up I get smashed by, of all things, a falling fridge." Seeing as his story was nothing but an accident, he was granted access. The third guy steps up tell his tale. "Well your honor, picture this, I'm naked in a refrigerator.