Three friends, Ted, Ned, and Fred, get killed in a car crash. They arrive all three together at the pearly gates and are excited that they will be let in, but St. Peter warns them, "There is only one rule in heaven, you must NOT step on the ducks, or you will suffer for eternity." The three friends shrug it off, "How hard could it be to not step on a duck!?"
St Peter let them in and they were surprised to see that heaven was full of ducks, "What the hell?" Ted said, "Why are all these ducks up here?"
"I don't know," says Ned, "But I'd hate to see what happens if we step on one."
The friends continued on their way, meeting new people, hanging out with the angels, when all of a sudden, Ted wasn't watching his step, and accidentally stepped on a duck. God appeared before him, "You have broken the only rule in heaven, now you must suffer for eternity." To the friend's horror, God chained him to the most unattractive woman they had ever seen, buck teeth, scars, half bald, the whole nine yards.
Soon after, the friends went their separate ways and explored heaven alone. Ned was enjoying the beautiful scenery one day when he saw Fred from across the way, chained to the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. He made a beeline toward his friend and asked him, "Man, what did you do to get such a gorgeous woman chained to you!?"
Fred stood smiling as the woman replied, "I don't know what he did, but I stepped on a duck."
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