15> Every time you have to hit the john, you find yourself asking a friend to come along.
14> Warning label states: "Caution: May make ass look fat."
13> After a few, you find yourself arguing that figure skating actually *is* a sport.
12> Your belches come out potpourri-scented.
11> You still cry into your eighth one, but now it's because the guy on the next stool is wearing the same outfit.
10> The slogan: "Get that bloated feeling *any* day of the month!"
9> The label boasts that it's this month's recommendation from Oprah's Beer Club.
8> Your desire to wear women's panties is stronger than usual.
7> When you squat to pee in the sink, you notice a fresh floral scent.
6> After you've slammed a few, you find yourself at Blockbuster trying to decide between "Sleepless in Seattle" and "Waiting to Exhale."
5> Regis Philbin gets funnier with every sip!
4> The can has a picture of a shirtless Fabio on the front and a bundt cake recipe on the back.
3> "Who cares about the game? 'Will and Grace' is on!"
2> There's no head unless you pour some liquor into it.
1> Your man-boobs have started lactating.
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[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]
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