The Gorilla and the Redneck

A small zoo in Georgia obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became impossible to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the gorilla was in heat, and her aggressive behavior could only be relieved with sexual interaction with a male counterpart. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

After considering nearly all possible options, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, a very strong physical man, had little sense but was always bragging about his honky tonk women. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions:

"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "you can't never tell no one about this, and I mean no one." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", Bobby Lee said, "In the event that there are offspring, I want all the children raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

And last," Bobby Lee said, "I'm gonna need another week to come up with the $500.00."

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