Bob is out on the links enjoying a nice round of golf with his buddy Bill. Suddenly, on the fourth fairway, a huge bird flies overhead and drops a turd on Bob's head.
"Whatever you do, Bob," says Bill, "don't wipe that turd off your head! EVER!"
"Why not?" asks Bob. "I've got a huge bird turd on my head and you're saying I have to keep it on my head for the rest of my LIFE?"
"Yes," says Bill. "It's a foo bird. And you know what they say about foo birds..."
But just as Bill is about to tell his friend what they say about foo birds, Bob interrupts him. "I don't care what they say about foo birds! I'm wiping it off!"
And Bob wipes the turd off the top of his head... and promptly keels over dead.
"NO!" cries Bill. "I was just about to tell him! 'If the foo shits, wear it!'"
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