Super-Duper One-Liners!

Here's a little bit-a-dis and a little bit-a-dat:


How can you tell the Irish guy in the hospital?
He's the one blowing the foam off of his bedpan.
===========================


Why don't Italians have acne?
It slides off.
==========================


Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a black baby?
They named him Sum Ting Wong!
==========================


What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horses behind?
A Mechanic.
=========================


What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A Speech Impediment!
=========================


What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half mast?
They're hiring.
=========================


Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
Because they're not going to work in the future either.
=========================


Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo!"
========================


Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.
========================


How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?
NONE- "He fell".
========================


Q. How do you make a cat drink?
A. Put it in a blender, and strain off the fur.
========================


Q. Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backward?
A. They like the part where the hooker gives the money back.
========================


Q. What is the first thing a blonde hears in the morning?
A. "See ya."
========================


Q. Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided?
A. The survivors were marooned.
========================


Q: What do Jimmy Hoffa and Linda Tripp have in common?
A: Nothing... yet.
========================