(Series) A tabloid hires a retired MMA fighter to write the headlines in an effort to save copy space.

Story: Speech impairment expert delights patient with early Christmas fancy dress.

Headline: Sanda!

Story: Suzanne Mcfamousinourtown dumped on wedding day by Israeli lover.

Headline: Jiu-jitsu!

Story: farmers set to start multi-storey farming with staple vegetables in new trials.

Headline: High karate!

Story: Japanese furniture and bakery store to open as competition to Swedish giants.

Headline: Aikido!

Story: New Irsaeli bakery's oven still hasn't arrived.

Headline: Judo!

Story: American wannabe president gloats about the price of his clothing.

Story: Muay Thai!

Japanese store's bakery section allows Israeli bakery to borrow some ingredients, but sets strict limit.

Headline: Taekwondo!

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