Response to "Rules Chicks Don't Understand"

I read this and I just want to set this creep straight. I will
add my comment after his.


Rules chicks don't understand:


1. Nothing says 'I love you' like a blowjob in the morning.
Response: Do it yourself. If your dick won't reach, you're not
my boyfriend.


2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
R: That might work. But first you must learn to aim. No lady is
willing to put down a urine covered toilet seat.


3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
R: Tell ya what, YOU can take care of this hair for a day and
maybe you'll change you mind about that.


4. He's never thinking about "The Relationship."
R: If that were true, women would be lesbians.


5. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of
the tides. Let it be.
R: Sunday = one of the two days of the week I'm not working
because you sit your ass in front of the T.V. set all day long.


6. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
R: Then why do you always tell me my ass looks big in everything
I wear.


7. You have enough clothes.
R: We may, but with all the breast implants you make us get it
calls for new bras, dresses, shirts, bathing suits....


8. You have too many shoes.
R: Well in order to "look fine" in everything we wear we have to
have a matching pair with every outfit.


9. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us
to like it.
R: Get a bigger dick and we'll stop crying.


10. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and
your Dad probably is too.
R: Our brothers are related, they must have some intelligence.
Yes our ex-boyfriends are idiots, why else would we have dumped
them? My father IS an idiot, he gave YOU permission to marry me.


11. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
R: That depends on the question.


12. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a
doctor.
R: It's a waste of $$. He'll only tell me to make you turn down
the damn T.V.


13. Nothing says 'I love you' like a blowjob in the morning.
R: Again, do it yourself. If your dick isn't big enough your not
my boyfriend.


14. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
R: Don't do 50 things wrong and there won't be 50 rules.


15. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
R: if we stopped faking, you'd tell us you'd rather be deceived
than ineffective.


16. It is neither your interest nor ours to take the quiz
together.
R: If I brought it up its in my interest.


17. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an
argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
R: If we followed that rule then we would lose all the fights
like you.


18. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
R: If we dressed like Victoria's Secret then it would no longer
be a secret.


19. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we
know how pretty you are?
R: Here is how. You stop looking at other women and we'll SHOW
you and let you EXPERIENCE our true beauty.


20. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
R: Who said we didn't want the genie to come out?


21. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say
during commercials.
R: How about turning off the damn T.V. and making eye contact
with us for 10 minutes?


22. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do
we.
R: Christopher Columbus reached America, not his destination.


23. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their
right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
R: Do you know how much we sweat down there?!?! If we didn't air
it out you wouldn't enjoy them as much.


24. When we're turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the
off-ramp, you saying, "This is our exit," is not strictly
necessary.
R: Your right its not. Only a blonde would say that. Because we
all know that it isn't the exit you really want.


25. Nothing says 'I love you' quite like a blowjob in the
morning.
R: Again, do it yourself, if you dick isn't long enough your not
my boyfriend.