Polite ways to tell a male he needs to zip up: By David Letterman:


10. The cucumber has left the salad.


9. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells.


8. You need to bring your tray table to the upright and locked position.


7. Paging Mr. Johnson...Paging Mr. Johnson.


6. Elvis has left the building.


5. The Buick is not all the way in the garage.


4. Our next guest is someone who needs no introduction.


3. You've got a security breach at Los Pantalones.


2. Men may be From Mars .. but I can see something that rhymes with Venus.


1. You've got your fly set for "Monica" instead of "Hillary"

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