If You're A Bear

If you're a bear


If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.


Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that, too.


If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.


If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.


I wanna be a bear.