I heard a great dad joke in the emergency room the other day at work.

So the nurse and I walk into the room and there's a nice middle aged gentleman

He seemed nervous so the nurse asked what the matter was:

"well did you hear about the guy that died at this hospital last week?"

*Nurse and I glance at each other nervously

"No? well he had to be rushed to emergency surgery the moment he showed up!"

*More nervous glances

"Well when they sewed him up they left a sponge in him by accident"

"....and he died of thirst the next day"

*cue peevish laughter from ultimate dad.