It was a doctor's first day at the mental hospital. One of the other doctors was showing him around and decided to bring him in to see three of the patients. They walked into the first room and there was a man pretending to swing a baseball bat. The new doctor asked him what he was doing.
"I'm babe Ruth. If I hit four home runs, I'm getting out of here"
The doctors write down notes and move on to the next room. There's a man pretending to swing a golf club. The new doctor asked him what he was doing.
"I'm Tiger Woods. If I win the masters today, I'm getting out of here"
The doctors take notes and move on to the third room. They walk in to find a man holding almonds and cashews, masturbating.
"What in the world are you doing?" The doctor asked.
"I'm fucking nuts. And I'm never getting out of here."
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