Doctor, doctor! said the panic-stricken woman, my husband was asleep with his mouth open, and he's swallowed a mouse! What shall I do? Quite simple, said the doctor calmly. You just tie a lump of cheese to a piece of string and lower it into your husband's mouth. As soon as the mouse takes a bite â haul it out. Oh, I see. Thank you, doctor. I'll go around to the fishmonger straight away and get a cod's head. What do you want a cod's head for? Oh- I forgot to tell you. I've got to get the cat out first!
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.