Clinton Administration Medical Dictionary

Acute - opposite of an ugly


Artery - the study of paintings


Bacteria - back door of a cafeteria


Barium - what doctors do to patients


Benign - what you are after you're 8.


Bowel - letter like A,E,I,O, or U


Cat Scan - searching for a kitty


Cauterize - made eye contact with her


Cesarean Section - neighborhood in Rome


Colic - a sheep dog


Concussion - a prisoner's sofa


Congenital - to be friendly


D & C - where the White House is


Dilate - to live too long


Enema - not a friend


Fester - quicker


Fibula - a small lie


Genital - not a Jew


GI series - a soldier ball game


Hangnail - a coat hook


Hospital - a prostitute ejecting saliva


Impotent - distinguished, well known


Jaundice - to include in a group


Kinesthetics - relationships among relatives


Labor Pain - getting hurt at work


Leper - a wild cat


Malaria - shopping place


Medical Staff - a doctor's cane


Morbid - a higher bid


Nitrates - cheaper than day rates


Node - was aware of


Outpatient - a person who fainted


Pap Smear - a fatherhood test


Pelvis - a cousin of Elvis


Post-operative - a letter carrier


Prostate - flat on your back


Recovery Room - a place used for upholstery work.


Rectum - dang near killed 'em


Rheumatic - amorous


Secretion - hiding something


Seizure - a Roman emperor


Serology - study of English Knighthood


Tablet - a small table


Terminal Illness.........getting sick at the airport


Tumor - more than one


Urinate - two steps short of a perfect "10".


Urine - opposite of you're out


Varicose - nearby


Vein - conceited