A young man is undecided where he should spend this year's vacation. He asks his granfather for advice.
Grandfather: 'When I was your age, I went to Paris. I went to a bar and everything was for free. I was totally drunk, climbed on the counter and pissed on the floor. After that I spanked that waitress' ass.'
The young man is excited: 'Wow! That sounds great! Thank you, grandfather' - and books the travel.
Two weeks later he finally arrives at home again. His nose is broken, his lips are bloody and he has a black eye.
Grandfather: 'My God! What has happened to you?!'
Young man: 'I don't know what I did wrong. I went to Paris, entered a bar and got totally drunk. As I proceeded to climb the counter, and opened my pants, the barkeeper beat me up. I wanted to grab the waitress' ass but she also slapped my face. When they finally realized that I didn't even bring money with me, they called the police.'
Grandfather: 'That's very strange... how did you get to Paris?'
Young man: 'By plane, and you?'
Grandfather: 'With the SS.'
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.