A man and his GF are married in church... (NSFW)

The woman says 'before this goes any further, I will not have sex with a condom - if you want to have sex with me, you better be prepared to take care of a child for the rest of your life'.

The man at first is hesitant, but considering he didn't think he'd get a better wife, agreed.

The man goes to a bar, sill disappointed, knowing that if he has any more than about 4 kids, he'll go bankrupt. Suddenly, in a drunken moment, he has an idea - he rushes to the hospital, and says 'tie my tubes - i dont want to get my wife pregnant, and she says she wont do it with me if we have a condom'.

A few hours later, he wakes up, and has a slightly uncomfortable sensation - he asks what happened, and the doctor says 'we tied your tubes - you can no longer give sperm during sex'. Excited, the man runs home, and immediately gets in bed with his wife.

A year later, he goes to see the doctor - he says 'My wife got pregnant!'

'That's impossible!' says the doctor. 'We treated you! Do you want to have another operation to make sure!'

The man agrees, goes under for another few hours, and wakes up to feel even more uncomfortable. He then nails his wife again, and comes right back to the doctor's office.

'It's not working!' he shouts

The doctor replied in disbelief 'Impossible! Your vans deferns are tied off! You literally cannot send sperm through your penis!'

'Look man, I don't know if you're as good a doctor as you say you are, but from what I saw, getting your tubes tied doesn't stop pregnancy, it just darkens the baby's skin colour!'

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