There was a seaman who had a wooden eye because he was a tight mean bastard who refused to pay for a professionally made eye ball. However he was very sensitive about people making fun of his eye ball. One night after being at sea for several months and being tight with money he thought he would try his luck at the local pubs for some pussy instead of going with the other guy's to proposition some of the local prostitute's.
He struck pay dirt by meeting a lady with the most marvelous figure. However instead of her mouth going across her face it went vertically straight up and down. On arriving back at the woman's place and making small talk the lady said she would like him to leave as she wanted her sleep.
This got the seaman angry as he wanted some pussy and told her she wouldn't have been any good in bed anyway. she yelled "WOULDN'T I" and the seaman thought she had said wooden eye and being very sensitive about his eye he retorted" WHO ARE YOU CALLING WOODEN EYE CUNT FACE".
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