The old lady put 6 cans of dog food on the supermarket conveyer belt, and began digging in her purse for her coupon. The cashier was the friendly sort, and struck up a conversation. "So, what kind of dog do you have?"
"Well," the old lady answered in a hushed tone, "I don't really have a dog. With the price of meat these days, I've figured out that I can make some good, cheap casseroles using dog food. My husband doesn't seem to know the difference, so I'm saving a lot of money by doing this."
The cashier was horrified. "You can't feed your husband dog food! You'll kill him!"
"Nah...he'll be okay. He's a tough old bird."
Every day, the old lady returned to buy dog food, and every day the cashier predicted the husband's imminent death until finally, one day, the old lady entered the store wearing black. She bought a few items, but no dog food. The cashier could not help herself, and asked, "And how is your husband this fine day?"
"George died yesterday," the old woman said sadly.
"Ahhh...the dog food..." the cashier said.
"No, it wasn't the dog food," the old lady said.
"Then how did he die?" the cashier asked.
"Strangest thing...." the old woman said. "He was sitting in the middle of the road licking himself and got hit by a bus."
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.