Watch out for Uncle Frank

A teacher tells Johnny’s class to ask their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end...

The next day the teacher asks who wants to go first. Johnny raises his hand and says, "My badass Uncle Frank was a pilot in Vietnam. One time he had to bail out over enemy territory with nothing but a flask of whiskey and a knife. He drank the whiskey on his way to the ground and landed in the middle of an enemy camp. He killed them all and walked out of there with a smile on his face."
"Johnny, what is the moral of this horrible story?" shouted the mortified teacher.

"Stay the fuck away from Uncle Frank when he's drinking."

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