And as usual the first one vomits all over himself. "Goddamnit, my wife's gonna be pissed."
"Whaterya bellyaching about? You always throw up on yourself."
"Yeah, but this time The Wife says she won't let me in if I smell like vomit anymore." So the Second Drunk thinks for a bit and says "I got an idea".
"Take a $20 bill and put it in your shirt pocket. Then tell her some other dude puked on you, but felt so bad, he gave you $20."
First Drunk says, "Damn, that's just crazy enough to work."
First Drunk finally stumbles home @ 3am, but the door is locked so he commences pounding and hollering 'till his wife gets up and cracks the door open (with the chain still on) just enough to get a whiff of him.
"Oh hell no motherfucker, I told you I wasn't cleaning up after your ass anymore when you get drunk."
"But it wasn't me this time."
"What?"
"No, Really! This other dude puked on me and he felt so bad he gave me $20. It's here in my pocket."
The Wife motions him closer to the door and reaches in his pocket and retrieves two $20 bills. "Why is there $40 here?"
"He shit in my pants too."
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