The Top 16 Disney Excuses for Using Haitian Sweatshops

!6. "Asian sweatshops all booked solid with Nike orders, and Kathie Lee beat us to the Hondurans."


15. "How else could we keep the price of a Disneyworld hot dog at a low $6.25?"


14. "It's super-taxfree-imperialistic-export-price-bodacious."


13. "They're a helluva lot cheaper than those lazy Taiwanese!"


12. "You mean Papa Doc and Baby Doc weren't cartoon characters?"


11. "Hey! When we had a bunch of dwarves working all day in a mine, you thought it was *cute*!"


10. "How the #$@$@%& else can we put a $3 toy in a $2.50 Happy Meal?"


9. "It's a Capitalist world, after all... and we're an uncaring, cheapass company."


8. "Crappiest Place On Earth" sign over factory entrance never fails to make that scamp Eisner giggle on visits.


7. "We're just trying to earn our 'Pirates of the Caribbean' title."


6. "It's all we could afford after we paid those Korean animators 17 cents an hour to make 'The Lion King.'"


5. "It gives those losers at Top 5 something to whine about."


4. "We prefer to think of them as 'enchanted sewing cottages.'"


3. "Mr. Eisner gets a kick out of the fact that the entire factory makes less per day than he makes each time he blinks his eyes."


2. "Hatians learn much more quickly than our second choice, Canadians."


1. "Zip-a-dee-do-dah, Zip-a-dee-ay! 16-hours-for-a-dollar-a-day!"