13. The male stripper you hired is moonlighting to supplement his full-time Sumo wrestling income.
12. Too much purging, not enough bingeing.
11. Obviously confused about your instructions, the dancer shows up wearing LEPER skin.
10. Someone spiked the punch with Summer's Eve.
9. The traditional game of "Famous Politicians I'd Sleep With" just took a turn for the serious with the arrival Mr. Starr and his subpoenas.
8. All those bags of WOW potato chips and Diet Sodas have given new meaning to the term, "spotting."
7. You knew that Daddy had taken a night job. You didn't know that Daddy's new job title was "Danny, the Firehose Dude."
6. One of your friends shows up late with the excuse that she had to give a quickie to some guy getting married next week.
5. You really didn't want your boss to "honor" you by volunteering to strip, but how can you say no to the President of the United States?
4. On your way to jail, you decide that ripping the pants off that "stripper" cop wasn't such a good idea.
3. Misunderstanding at entertainment agency results in a special appearance by Chip and Dale.
2. Your water breaks.
1. That damn Martha Stewart forgets to bring the pubic topiary centerpiece.
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