of a new and terrible disease. The only cure, according to the Vatican's top physician, is for his holiness to engage in the down and dirty. To survive his ailment, the Pope must have sex. To not do so means certain death. He refuses at first, horrified at the thought. But slowly, the bishops convince him that it could be kept quiet, and no one would ever know. Finally the pope relents, but only under the condition the bishops find a special woman for the job. "She must have these three qualities, or God will never forgive me." "Yes, Holiness. Of course. What is the first quality?" "She must be blind, so that she can't see to whom she is making love." The bishops nod in agreement. "That is most wise, oh Pope. And the second quality?" "She must be a good Catholic woman, without a husband." "But of course! Wise and good is your wish, oh holy one. And the third quality?" "Big titties."
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