Two Irishmen are sat in a pub when a fisherman walks in carrying the biggest carp they've ever seen. Curious about how he managed to catch such a magnificent fish, they asked him what his technique is.
"All you have to do" said the fisherman, "is lean over the edge of the bridge and tickle the belly of the fish. Then they just stop dead in their tracks so you can pick them up with no problems."
Eager to try out the fisherman's wise words, the pair ran out early the next morning to the bridge to try and catch some fish. Irishman 1 agrees to hold the feet of Irishman 2 while Irishman 2 reaches down to tickle the fish.
An hour passes and Irishman 1 is getting impatient.
"Have you got one yet?!" he yelled to Irishman 2.
"Not yet mate" Irishman 2 replied.
6 more hours pass and Irishman 1 is struggling to stay awake.
"Anything yet?!", he yelled.
"Not yet!" came the reply.
Another 6 hours pass and Irishman 1 is on the brink of giving up when suddenly Irishman 2 yells "QUICK PICK ME UP PICK ME UP!!!"
"Have you caught one?!" exclaimed Irishman 1.
"No, there's a bloody train coming!"
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