There was once an Irish priest named Father Patrick, full of passion and zeal, who hated the English. While his congregation just accepted it as part of his eccentricity, it started to make them uncomfortable when this bigotry seeped into mass.
It got to the point where a small group of them arranged to meet with a cardinal, with whom they shared their discomfort. The cardinal, also Irish, calls in Father Patrick - "Faith, Paddy me lad! I understand that you don't like t'English, but you're a man of t' cloth, y'can't express yer hatred so tru'ly and openly. I want you t'swear by t' Blessed Virgin that you'll never belittle our English brothers in public again!"
Hesitatingly, Father Patrick agrees, "Aye, Cardinal Michael. I swear I'll not blast those English dogs from my pulpit again."
The next Sunday, Father Patrick was conducting Sunday School for all the little Irish boys and girls. The topic at hand was the last supper, and Father Patrick was at his zealous best.
"So Jaysus and his disciples were sittin' 'roun t' table, and Jaysus says, "Tonight, one of you shall betray me. Saint Peter, prince of t' apostles asks, "Is it me, Jaysus?", and Jaysus says "No Peter m'lad, 'tis not you." Saint Andrew the pure asks , "Is it I, Jaysus?" "No Andy, m'boy, 'tis not you." Jaysus then looked 'round the table and his eyes fell knowin'ly on Judas Iscariot, that dirty, sly, traycherous mongrel. Judas, that filth, looked up at Jaysus and said, "Cor blimey guvnah, but that's a nahsty accusation!"
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.