Texas Three Kick Rule.

A lawyer from California was duck hunting between a lake, and a farm.

The Lawyer was a bad shot, and scared all the ducks into the air. One finally landed on the fence of the farm across from the lake. The lawyer took aim, and fired. The duck keeled over and fell onto the dirt on the farm's side of the fence.

The lawyer, excited, rushed over and hopped the fence, only to find the farmer holding the duck by it's legs.

"That is my duck sir, may I have it back?"

"Fell on muh property son. Looks like it's MY duck."

After a little arguing the lawyer lost his temper. The lawyer told the farmer that he would "sue his ass" if he didn't hand over the duck.

The farmer said, "Well son let me finish. You ain't from 'round here so I wouldn't 'spect you to understand how we do things here in Texas."

"Ok, how do you do things in this backwoods shithole?"

"Three kick rule boy. I kick you three times, since this is my property then you git to kick me three times. We keep on goin' til one of us gives up."

Assuming he could out kick the fragile old man, the lawyer agreed.

He stood tall and let the farmer go first. The farmer's first kick with his heavy steel toe boots, landed between the lawyer's testicles. It dropped him to all fours. The 2nd kick nearly tore his nose off, and the third kick, while he was rolling around in the mud, hit him square in the gut.

After a moment, the lawyer arose and gathered all of his strength. "ALRIGHT YOU OLD HICK MY TURN"

"Nah son...I give up. Take your duck."