A guy is talking to his buddy one day and he tells him "man, there's this new girl that moved in next door. She's drop dead gorgeous, but I can't go talk to her because every time I see her I get a raging boner. Rock hard every time I get a glimpse of her. I can't go talk to her like that, she would see it and it would be too embarrassing."
His buddy says "I got an idea, how about tomorrow you go see her, but before you do you duct tape your penis to the side of your leg that way if it gets hard it'll stay out of sight." The guy agrees that's a great idea and he'll try it tomorrow.
The next day the guy comes back over and is obviously down in the dumps. His buddy asks, "so tell me about it, how'd it go?" He says, "well I did just like you said I duct taped it and went over with the plans of asking her to dinner. I knocked on her door and when she answered you should have seen her. She was wearing a skin tight dress and you could see every perfect curve of her body, with a low cut so you could see the cleavage between her perfect breasts, and to top it off her hair and make up were done like she was ready for a night out on the town."
The buddy asks "Yeah? And then what happened?", To which the guy replies " I kicked her in the face".
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.