One day in the Garden

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a
problem!"


"What's the problem, Eve?"


"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden
and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but
I'm just not happy."


"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.


"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."


"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for
you."


"What's a 'man', Lord?"


"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an
enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All
in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger and faster and
more muscular than you. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a
ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in
the sack."


"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.


"Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But,
you can have him on one condition."


"What's that, Lord?"


"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."