Once upon a time, two race horses were born...

This is long, but worth it.

Their names were Herman and Berman and they were twins. Herman was born just slightly before Berman. Herman and Berman were colts of average work horses and were to work the fields everyday. One day Herman and Berman decide to have a race. Everyday at noon, the lunch bell goes off, so Herman and Berman agree that the bell will signal go. The first horse to circle the farm wins. So, the next day, right before noon, Herman and Berman line up and wait for the lunch bell. Once it goes off, the two young colts dash around the farm as quickly as possible. First Herman has the lead, then it's Berman, then Herman, then Berman and Herman finally wins. "Darn, I want a rematch tomorrow" says Berman, to which Herman agrees.

It is the next day and the horses line up, ready to go. The lunch bell goes off and so do the horses. First Herman has the lead, then it's Berman, then Herman, then Berman and Herman finally wins by a smidgen. This continues to happen every single day. It's always a close race with Herman and Berman boxing it out for first and Herman winning by a smidgen. This becomes a lunch time tradition. It is the highlight of the day to all of the farm animals. The dog, the pigs, the cows, chickens, etc. all love the race, despite the incredibly consistent outcome.

The farmer soon realizes how incredibly talented the two horses are. He enters them in an actual race and hires rookie jockys. Berman is stokked. "Today is the day you go down. My jocky is lighter than yours" says Berman to Herman. "We'll see about that" replies Herman. The gun sets the race off. Immediately Herman and Berman smoke the field. The race will clearly be won by either Herman or Berman. They horses get 100m away from the finish in a dead tie. Herman inches ahead. Then comes Berman. Then Herman. Then Berman. Aaand Herman wins.

This continues for every race of the two horse's careers. The two become famous as an unstoppable duo and never place anything but first or second.

Finally, the two horses retire. They are just too old to race competitively anymore. But they still race around the farm every lunch break to the same result.

Herman and Berman finally have one last race. All the animals gather to watch. The two horses are way too old to race, but they try their hardest. The bell goes off and the two run off. They are significantly slower than their youth days, but they have some zest to them yet. Herman takes a quick lead over Berman, but Berman catches up as the round the barn. Berman takes a slight lead at the halfway point and the Herman nudges ahead soon thereafter. Then it's Berman. Then Herman. And Berman. And Herman. And Berman and Heman and Berman. AAand BERMIN WINS.

"Ha take that!" shouts Berman to Herman. "I won!". "No you didn't, I won" replies Herman. They argue for a little while and then the dog says "No, Berman definitely won, but only by a little". At that point, both horses say in unison "Oh my gosh! A talking dog!"

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