No legged parrot

A guy is convinced his wife is cheating on him so he comes up with a plan to buy a parrot to spy on his wife.

He goes to the pet shop and asks the pet shop owner for the best speaking, most intelligent parrot he has. The owner disappears out back for a while and comes out with a cage with a white sheet draped over it. He says "inside this cage is the most intelligent parrot I have ever had.. The only problem is, during transit he lost both his legs so he has adapted a clever way to stay on his perch"

He removes the sheet and to the man's surprise, the parrot is hanging by his penis.

After controlling his giggles the man says "so long as he is clearly spoken and intelligent, i'll have him!"

The man takes the parrot home and presents it to his wife as a gift. With the wife out the room he says to the parrot "Right, you are to watch my wife's every move while I'm at work and then in the evening you report back any weird behaviour, got it?"
The parrot replies "No problem - simple!"

The next day after work, the man comes in and takes the parrot to one side. "So? Did anything strange happen?"

The parrot calmly replies "Well, a man came round shortly after you left for work and him and your wife sat in the living room with their arms around eachother watching TV"

"Then what happened?!" The man asked growing evermore curious

"Well they started kissing and groping eachother. After a while the man took his shirt off"

"THEN WHAT HAPPENED??"

"Your wife ripped all her clothes off and started playing with herself"

Trying not to blow his top, the man asks through gritted teeth "Then what?!"

The parrot looks away sheepishly and responds "I don't know, I got a boner and fell off"