So he goes to the hospital to see his primary physician.
"Doc, my new wife is a dynamo. Every time she touches me I go off. You got anything to help me last long enough to satisfy her?"
"Just the thing," the doctor replies, pulling a starter pistol from his desk. The big red kind that starts marathons. "You just need to reset your groove when you get close. Distract yourself by shooting this off."
"That just might work!" The husband says.
He grabs the gun and throttles home. He runs upstairs where his wife is still in her nightgown brushing her teeth. He drops the gun next to the bed and heads straight to her. He grabs her and throws her on the bed. They start kissing. Then they start 69ing. Things get heavy so he reaches for the gun and fires it off.
27 minutes later he's being wheeled into the emergency room. Bleeding and covered in shit.
His doctor, who happens to be on call runs up and asks what happened.
Husband replies, "You son of a bitch! She bit my dick off, shit in my face, and my neighbor jumped out of the closet with his hands up!"
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