My Dad told me this army joke when I was young. It's pretty bad. [NSFW] (x-post /r/dadjokes)

"When I was young and in the army, we didn't ever see any girls, going months without seeing any, in fact. Us army boys were still young, and all that pent up time going without girls made us desperate for anyone. So, when I had a break for a few days for the first time in 6 months, I went down to a bar to have a couple of drinks. An older man looked over at me, realizing that I was in the army, and told me that he had a really beautiful daughter. She was getting lonely, and he suggested that I take her out tonight. I was immediately interested, going so long and all, and as things had it I ended up following him home to meet the girl. We get to his house and I see here- she didn't have any legs. The only thing I could think of doing was going out to a drive-in. So we went out, and she was actually quite nice and funny. She also really wanted to kiss and all, which was good. So, after a good night, I take her home and we go down to her room. She tells me that she wants to have sex, so I asked her how. She told me to go to the coat closet, put a jacket on her, and hang her on the door. This sounded crazy, but being so horny, I did it. Just as we started going at it, her dad came in. I freaked out and froze there, the girl on the hanger fully unclothed besides the jacket keeping her up, and me, buck naked. I began to apologize, stuttering, but her dad said, 'What? Are you going to just leave her hanging??'"