Michigan Jokes

It is Michigan week...here we go...


A little boy and his mother were walking through a Michigan
cemetery when they came upon a headstone that read "Here lies a
Michigan graduate and an honest man." The little boy asked,
"Mommy, why did they bury 2 people in there?"


Coach Lloyd Carr is only dressing 10 players for the Michigan
game against Ohio State. The rest of the team will get dressed
by themselves.


Q: How do you get a Michigan cheerleader into your dorm room?
A: Grease her hips and push.


Q: Why is ice no longer available at Michigan football games?
A: The senior who knew the recipe graduated.


Q: What are the longest 3 years of a Michigan football player's
life?
A: His freshman year.


Q: Why did Michigan replace the stadium grass with Astroturf?
A: To keep the cheerleaders from grazing during games.


Q: How do you get a Michigan graduate off your front porch?
A: Pay him for the pizza


Q: What does the average University of Michigan football player
get on his S.A.T.?
A: Drool.


Q: Why are there no Nativity scenes on the Michigan University
campus at Christmas?
A: Because they can't find three wise men and a virgin.