Men Are Like...

Men are like ... Coffee
The best ones are rich, warm, full-bodied and can keep you up
all night long.


Men are like ... Cement
After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.


Men are like ... Chocolate Bars
Sweet, smooth and they usually head right for your hips.


Men are like ... Blenders
You think that you need one, but you're not quite sure why.


Men are like ... Coolers
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.


Men are like ... Copiers
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.


Men are like ... Curling Irons
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.


Men are like ... Government Bonds
They take so long to mature.


Men are like ... High Heels
They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.


Men are like ... Horoscopes
They always tell you what to do, but they're usually wrong.


Men are like ... Lawn Mowers
If you're not pushing one around, you're usually riding it.


Men are like ... Lava Lamps
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.


Men are like ... Laxatives
They irritate the shit out of you.


Men are like ... Mascara
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.


Men are like ... Mini Skirts
If you're not careful they'll creep up your legs.


Men are like ... Noodles
They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need
dough.


Men are like ... Parking Spots
The good ones are already taken, and the ones that are left are
handicapped or extremely small.


Men are like ... Weather
Nothing can be done to change them.


Men are like ... Plungers
They spend most of their lives in a hardware store or the
bathroom.


Men are like ... Popcorn
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.


Men are like ... Placemats
They only show up when there's food on the table.


Men are like ... Snowstorms
You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get or
how long it will last.


Men are like ... Used Cars
Both are easy to get, cheap and unreliable.


Men are like ... Vacations.
They never seem to be long enough.